Skip this if you like Sarah P.

Associated Press

I don’t mean to be rude,  Ms. Palin, but last I checked, it was Nov. 14, that’s exactly 10 days after the election. Please be a good sport and go home. You have children who need you, including a special needs baby.  You have a state to run. You have to plot your course for world domination. Best you do that in Alaska where the air is cold and pure. You need to get out of those stuffy TV studios.

Once again, the election is over. There will not be a recount. Please stop with the campaign talking points. Stop saying “Bill Ayers” and “Joe the Plumber.” Stop defending yourself and replaying every offensive and defensive move over the last two months.  Whatever about the clothes. You’ve said your piece. Take a cue from John McCain and lay low.

I’m trying to be neutral about you. To not dislike you. But you are overexposed. Does the name Kato Kaelin mean anything to you?

I’m done.

Dear Mr. President-Elect:

The long road to the White House is over. You have made it up the Hill. No matter what happens next, you are an historic figure. A first.

Now, go get yourself some rest. Mourn your grandmother. Have yourself an inauguration and then I have a few simple requests:

Can I send you at least two e-mails a day?

Can I ask you for help when my personal deadlines are nearing?

Can I count on you for at least a $25 donation to help me meet my goals?

Will you wear my badge on your shirt? Plant my sign on your big White House lawn?

Will you call all your friends and family urging them to come out and support me when I visit your town?

Just wondering …

–MomZombie

Overheard

Overheard at the local campaign office where I’ve been volunteering:

A middle-aged man walks in, asks for some information about the candidate. After he’s handed materials and leafs through them, he tells the volunteer that his biggest worry is voter apathy.

Volunteer offers a number of ways in which this man can help combat voter apathy.

Would he like to canvass neighborhoods? 

Hmmm….. no, he says, shaking his head.

Would he like to work the phone banks?

Oh, no, he says, shaking his head a little faster,  I couldn’t do that.

Would he like to volunteer for a number of jobs on Election Day or the three days preceeding Nov. 4?There are all kinds of things to do: distribute fliers with voter information, serve as a greeter at polling places, or donate food and/or beverages to the campaign office?

Nah… I don’t really like to get involved, he says and leaves the office.

Volunteer turns on her heels and throws her hands in the air.